Compromise

The difference between when you're here,
And when you're out at sea,
Is much greater to you my dear,
And not so much for me.
Talking to me is hard both ways,
But to me it seems I lose,
For when you're gone, I know why you don't
But when you're here, you choose.
I understand you have little time,
To do with what you please,
But understand that talking to you,
Is what puts my mind at ease.
So what I ask is to compromise,
So a bit of time's for me,
A little bit less with the guys,
And I will be happy.

7/27/12
MLS

Back On Shore

Here you are,
Back on shore,
Above the submarine.
Here I am,
I see more,
Of the same ol' lonely scene.
There you are,
Free to go,
You've got friends you wanna see.
Here I am,
With my own foe,
I've got no one else but me.

7/27/12
MLS

So Mortal

Trying not to look around as you walk down the hall,
Footsteps making piercing sound, you seem to be so small.
Walking through, so humbled, grasping to your gift,
Seeing people crumbled, your thoughts begin to drift...

How did they all get this way? Why this much despair?
People living through decay, in sterilizing air.
Humans converting to machine. Beds. Equipment. Wire.
Viewing the data on their screen to see if they’ll expire.

The hall is twisting and turning as you visit your loved one,
Your stomach is sick and churning wanting this visit to be done.
Nurses running around, doctors out and giving guidance,
You keep your head to the ground, and despite the noise there’s silence.

You make it to your loved one’s room, set your gift upon the table,
You’re noticing the general gloom, they’re staring at the cable.
They look up at you, pain in their eyes, and strike up a conversation,
Acutely aware that life is a prize, they’re eyes meet your with fixation.

You kept your composure because for them you must be strong,
While encased in this enclosure, they know there’s something wrong.
You stayed a while to talk, then left to be on your way,
Take a glance at a clock, notice the time that slipped away.

When you step outside it’s like you've traveled through a portal,
Stripped of all your pride, you have never felt so mortal.

MLS
11/18/12

Anticipation

I’m waiting for my life to unfold,
And waiting for the stories untold
That are concealed,
To be revealed,
As age wears the body old.

I cannot seem to shake the feeling,
We’ve got potential beyond the ceiling,
I’m in a trance,
Give me the chance,
Say those words that begin my healing.

Anticipation, lasting hope,
Stringing along, weaving rope,
Keeps me awake,
For goodness sake,
I don’t know how I manage to cope.

With the intensity of the sun,
And the accuracy of a gun,
I’m taking aim,
Releasing the flame,
This feeling, to me, says you are the one.

MLS
2/18/12

Without Closure

Back and forth, I have been pacing,
As I realize the time I am wasting,
Avoiding the problems I have been facing,
With my hopes high, and my heart racing,
Now I know it’s nothing I’m chasing,
Only memories I was copy and pasting.

MLS
10/21/11

It’s Hard To Write

You see people around, so oblivious,
Not a single worry on their mind.

While you see the world, so hideous,

People are so damn blind.

Words are not fit to describe,
The ever-increasing frustration,

Being outside of the judgemental tribe,

That is constantly sweeping the nation.

You don’t know why you feel this way,
Why did this not come before?

When was your view such an ominous grey,

With things that you usually ignore?

Where is the water to douse your fire,
What is the reason to blame?
Usually writing is good to expire,
The burning, blazing flame.

Now sitting here, dark in the night,
Not sure of the words needed to heal,

Because it’s very hard to write,

When you don’t really know how you feel.

MLS
9/11/12

Strong

While I am strong, I am also weak,
I do things wrong, and the future seems bleak,
But one thing I know, that I’d like to convey,
Is that I love you so, and I’d like you to stay.
There is something I do, that is most dangerous,
I have a negative view, when I’m thinking of us,
While I try to block, the times with ill thinking,
It tends to unlock, the self-esteem into sinking.
You see, this is why, I love talking to you,
I take on a high, and feel I’ll pull through,
Anything life brings, no matter to what,
You give me my wings, the joy is uncut.
What I have learned, on this very day,
Is why I’m concerned, of being far away,
It isn’t being alone, while you’re out at sea
It’s more unknown. It’s dealing with me.

MLS
7/15/12

Far Away

Here I feel so alone,
Away from all that I've known,
Although this is not the first,
I feel as if I am cursed,
That my head should be turned to stone.

Now and then I feel the pain,
Watching a window full of rain,
I think of my situation,
Away from my home location,
It wraps itself within my brain.

Slowly, softly, losing friends,
Experiencing a series of ends,
Not exactly what I had planned,
Somehow I wish they’d understand,
Wish they could see it from my own lens.

However, this is not the case,
Most are gone without a trace,
Friendships are very hard to keep,
Miles away, where distance is steep,
I guess a few will do in this place.

MLS
7/15/12

Over the River and Through the Wood

Over the river and through the wood,
A little girl walks with a bright red hood,
Not knowing what she has in store,
Knocking upon her grandmother’s door...

There’s no answer, where could she be?
She walks right in using her own silver key,
All of a sudden she’s in a cave,
Watching an old man digging a grave,
She approaches him, he turns to her,
“Can you by chance help me sir?”
He steps aside, shaking his head,
Ignoring what the little miss said,
He walks away, but on the floor,
She notices a steel trap door,
She opens it and peers through the dark,
She hears a faint and dying bark,
Down the stairs she starts to run,
She gets to a room and hears a gun...

There in the corner, she gasps when she sees,
Her mother writhing in pain, covered in bees,
Beyond her mom, she sees her dad,
Blood on his lips, he’s drunk and mad,
He raises his gun, she turns to run,
Needless to say, he shot someone,
She cannot believe he shot his own daughter,
She drops to the floor next to a pool of water...

She stops and stares at her reflection,
The blood flowing down, the paling complexion,
Struggling to breathe, she’s turned onto her back,
As her father goes to open his sack,
He rustles around, taking his time,
Pulling out tools, preparing his crime,
She looks into his bloodshot eyes,
In the distance hears her mother’s cries...

She smells his breath of too much beer,
She tastes her blood and feels her fear,
Creeping through her, destroying hope,
As her father pulls out a rope,
Thin and tight, almost like wire,
Wrapped around her waist, he lit it on fire,
She hears her father’s deep throaty laugh,
While he watches her burn in half...

As her blood red hood is flaming,
Careless of the life it’s claiming,
Just before she stops breathing,
He keeps her alive, she’s not leaving,
Dousing the flame, injecting solutions,
It speeds up her heart, creates the illusions,
She does not get quick, sweet death,
Despite her attempt to take her last breath...

From out of nowhere, a blood-curdling scream,
Shaken, awakened, from that forsaken dream,
She sees the place where her grandmother stood,
Over the river and through the wood.

MLS
3/25/12

The Truth

I am not writing this for me, I am writing this for you.
Please read these words carefully, for I assure you they are true.
You've come to me before, saying you still think of me.
I blew you off, unbelieving, but now I think I see.
At college, I've had time alone, time with just my thoughts.
Of how things used to be, and how I am distraught.
I am not asking for forgiveness, that I know I can’t obtain.
I am not asking for a second chance, for I know that that’s insane.
I guess I feel you need to know, what’s going through my head.
In short, quite simply, it’s you; and the previous things you’ve said.
I remember a certain day when you took my shoe for fun.
Then you put it on my foot and said “You must be the one.”
That memory inflicts such pain, it’s burning in my brain.
Here I sit, one year later, knowing I’m the one to blame.

MLS
1/6/12

You Can’t Lose What You’re Fighting For

There are some things in your life, that you just can’t ignore,
Other moments heat you up, and unleash your inner core,
Don’t freak out, you can’t sneak out,
Don’t lose what you’re fighting for.

When you think you are lost, and can’t find a door,
You’ve been standing forever, then you hit the floor,
Don’t you dare quit, you’re not out of it,
Remember what you’re fighting for.

When you know you are tired, know that you’re sore,
But people keep pressing, and asking for more,
They bring you down, ‘til you almost drown,
Don’t lose what you’re fighting for.

You are looking for something, you open a drawer,
And here’s where you realize, that you are so poor,
Don’t sit and mourn, don’t be forlorn,
Remember what you’re fighting for.

You should find something, you like and adore,
And you will find wealth, and riches galore,
Which you can go send, straight to a friend,
Don’t lose what you’re fighting for.

You may be attacked, by something strong as a boar,
And all your tries fail, like you’re fighting a war,
Wipe of the blood, the dirt and the mud,
Remember what you’re fighting for.

You look at some pictures, that somebody tore,
You then seek revenge, to settle the score,
They took out your heart, and ripped it apart,
But don’t lose what you’re fighting for.

If you give up, say you can’t take anymore,
If you give in, and just walk out the door,
I’m afraid it’s too late, you've chosen your fate,
You’ve lost what you’re fighting for.

MLS
12/20/08

The Locked Door

(Sonnet)

I never thought I’d find someone like you,
You’ve surprised me in more ways than one,
I’ve felt like you were too good to be true,
Like a lion, who is second to none.

You’re very persistent, and so headstrong,
When I’ve needed you, you’ve always been there,
And when you’re ‘round me, you could do no wrong,
Because next to you, no one could compare.

No words could describe, what you’ve done for me,
I knew you were special, right from the start,
If I had a lock, then you’d have the key,
The key that’d open, the path to my heart.

But now here I sit,
Wondering each day,
‘Cause who would have thought,
You’d leave me someday?

MLS
12/17/10

I Remember Better Days

I remember better days
I’d wake up to the sun’s bright rays
Think of you
Then go to class
Come see you
Then try to pass
The time away
Till I see you
And enjoy the day
By knowing you
Were there for me
Through and through.
You were there for me
Through and through.

Yes, I remember better days
That weren't covered in this haze
Now it seems those days have faded
Things just got too complicated
I’d think of you
And have to wonder
Were you true?
And I’d feel thunder
I’d want to know
If what you thought
Would make us grow
Or if I’d been caught
Loving wrongly
With no return
I felt so strongly
I felt the burn.
I felt so strongly
I felt the burn.

I remember better days
But now my eyes can’t help but glaze
Over when I see you
In my mind
You stick like glue.
In my mind
You stick like glue.
I remember better days.

MLS
1/3/12

I Thought You Were Perfect

I thought you were perfect,
I could see you and me,
Together at heart,
I thought it could be.

I imagined our future,

Hoping for new,

Experiences and encounters,

Not alone, but with you.

I tried to be perfect,

One you’d want by your side,

I tried to be true,

One that has never lied.

Eight months I had waited,

With courage and hope,

My feelings never faded,

With no clue how to cope.

Just when I thought,

That we could be one,

I learned that your thoughts of me,

Amounted to none.

I thought you were perfect,
I thought you were smart,
What I didn’t know,
Is that you’d break my heart.

I took the news graciously,

In fact, I was glad,

It was an odd feeling,

Not being sad.

But the next couple days,

I was fixed in a trance,

The worst of it all,

Was not getting the chance.

“I really don’t need you,”

That’s just what I’d say,

To make all my thoughts of you,

Go away for the day.

After all of the months,

I wish I had known,

That I was unreasonable;

I’d be alone.

I thought you were perfect,
I looked up to you,
Silly me not to realize,
You were too good to be true.

Just a few days later,

What do I see?

You with someone,

And that someone’s not me.

Of course she is pretty,

More than I’ll ever be,

Sure, it’s just a picture,

But I’d rather not see.

You may be thinking,

“What’s the big deal?”

But you’d understand,

If you knew how I feel.

Time continues past,

And it begins to sink in,

It happened so fast,

Now I’m destroyed from within.

I thought you were perfect,
I thought you the best,
But as it turns out,
You’re just like the rest.

I still often wonder,

If you remember my name,

I’m sure you still do,

But it’s just not the same.

There’s always tomorrow,

And the day after that,

To bring back the sorrow,

Like a scavenging rat.

I didn’t get what I wanted,

And hoped for so much,

I felt I was taunted,

By the thought of your touch.

I still think of you,

At night as I lay,

I’m not in your life,

‘Cause you want it that way.

I thought it could work,
I thought I was strong,
I thought you were perfect,
It seems I was wrong.

MLS
5/1/11

The Happy Place

Despite life’s long and bitter trying,
Filled with greeting and goodbye-ing,
I think I finally found my niche,
That timely tune, that perfect pitch,
Where I was meant to be content,
Distracted from the problems sent.
Tap tap tap, who’s at the door?
Reality has come to life once more...

MLS
3/8/12

The Brewing Storm

Children await the bright blue day,
Where they can go outside to play,
Don’t you enjoy the Sun’s bright rays?
And then the sky begins to glaze...

The clouds come in, it’s quite a sight,
The extremes arrive to start their fight,
The kids are running away in fright,
And so begins the dark stormy night.

When I look, I think of you,
The day you left for someone new,
How I loved walking with your shoes,
Now I’m calm as the dark storm brews.

MLS
3/9/12

Jolteon

Seeing the epic flash of yellow,
Hearing the ever fearsome bellow,
Leaving opponents down and crying,
Resistant against both Steel and Flying,
Mane of white and eyes of black,
Enemies fall when you attack,
You’re so strong, yet still majestic,
You obey, but you’re far from domestic,
In between your lightning strikes,
Unleashing the fury of your spikes,
Using your charged, needled fur,
Hit after hit, becoming a blur,
Training with me, we’re better than others,
Even those with your sisters and brothers,
Together we are a very good team,
Keeping up with those most supreme,
To be your partner, I truly am blessed,
For with you, I know, I am the very best.

MLS
3/4/12

Over You

You’re lucky I got over you,
For had I not, I’d still be ‘round,
Waiting, waiting, for the clue,
To bring me back at the slightest sound.

You had me wrapped around your finger,
Now I know you didn't want me there,
Ignorant, I began to linger,
Despite the fact you didn’t care.

You continued to claim you wanted a friend,
But you had it dragged on for so long,
I realize you didn’t want it to end,
The hurt, the pain, the lies, the wrong.

You wanted me to be your slave,
The way you claimed me in your life,
I was lowly, and you were the knave,
The “nobleman” wanting to use his knife.

You call me dumb and immature,
Expect me to stay even after that,
Assume that I will stand and endure,
Hit after hit, and the blows with the bat.

You say I can’t handle being friends,
And perhaps that accusation is true,
But try viewing it from my own lens,
And see what I have seen with you.

I am so sick of you, sick of your crap,
Go leave bait for a different soul,
I am no longer the prey in your trap,
So re-cover up your pitted hole.

Funny how a sorry came so hard from you,
Whereas I said it every other day,
Even when you were the reason I was blue,
You’d just give an excuse, with no apology to pay.

If I still liked you, I’d still be around,
Trying to differ what’s lie and what’s true,
But either way, you would be crowned,
So I am so lucky that I’m over you.

MLS
2/12/12

The Break

I've got so much to say, I don’t know where to start,
I don’t really want to do this, but I've got to do my part.

I know you have your reasons, I completely understand,
Although I’m kind of curious, I will make no demand.

I’m sorry I’m not right for you, but some things cannot be,
Not every boat is fit to float, out on the raging sea.

My feelings are unchanged, my emotions will not show,
For I do not break easily, as you already know.

I know that you feel better, that I can take this well,
But I know any other way, I’d be putting you through hell.

And come on, you know me, you know that’s not my style,
Don’t look back, don’t regret, don’t leave without your smile.

You know enough about me, through all the things we've faced,
And one thing I fear is that you think this was a waste.

This conclusion will not bother me, that’s a promise I can make,
As for all the good memories, that is something I will take.

To comfort any second thoughts, you made a good decision,
If you hadn't stepped up like that, I never could have risen.

Lastly, I appreciate the way you increased my self-esteem,
If I could somehow repay you, just ask, and you’ll redeem.

So I guess this is goodbye, to this idea we call dating,
But fear not, because in me, your friendship’s never fading.

After all, this is better, I’m not trying to complain,
I will be just fine, don’t worry, I am free of any pain.

(two days later)
The only thing that I regret, is not to hear your voice,
But I’ll move on with my life, because I have no choice.

MLS
12/4/08

The Afterthoughts

You and I, I and you,
Looking back, since we’re through,
We weren't wrong, but we weren’t right,
The darkness showed, beneath the light,
I picked it up, and things went wrong,
I was weak, and you were strong,
You knew your place, but not me,
From your view, I did not see,
What I was doing, or what I’d done,
I’m athletic, but could not run,
Each way I went, I hurt someone.

MLS
Jan. 2012